Dreamt of being in a horribly abusive relationship where every time I tried to run it would be in slow motion and I couldn’t get away..The person who was hitting me was the one who got bruised.

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Last night, I dreamt I was watching a mid 90’s snowboarding video and there I was, dropping cliffs and going big. The only way I recognized myself was because I saw my baby blue snowboarding pants and I saw my snowboarding style (form, the way I grabbed my board, etc).

There were interviews of other snowboarding women from the video in present day and they had aged from smoking and doing lots of drugs. They looked like they were already in there 60’s but they were my age.

In my dream I was going to have a baby and I had befriended an x-convict and his wife. We talked at our adjoining fence and they wanted to help me deal with my emotions from being pregnant.

I woke up just now feeling relieved that it was all a dream.
——————-
I think I dreamt about being pregnant because on our walk yesterday, Amy and I talked about how we feel about having babies. We’re in the same boat, feeling selfish that we’re not ready to dedicate the next 20 years to raising children. And that whole birthing process scares the poop out of both of us.

Maybe one day, that feeling will change but for now, I’m focused on career and music and travel.

It was nice to spend quality time with a girlfriend talking about these things. A reminder that girl time is so important!

Tonight, a bunch of girls and I are going to see Clueless at Red Rocks. My first Film on the Rocks. I’m excited!!

Better get up and start this beautiful day!

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I grew up coming down here to good ol’ Richmond / Rosenburg, TX every summer to visit my 2 favorite cousins Josh and Travis and here we are in our adult life, most everybody now married, starting families, but it seems that when we’re together our youthfulness never fades. It’s always the same ol’ silliness ensuing.

I went to my cousin Josh and his fabulous wife Kristy’s baby shower today and met a woman whose family is from Hungary. She told me about how her mother escaped to the US and how her father created her an escape route to safely get the family here.  Very interesting!

We also played a game called “Place the Biscuit” where we (Josh, Travis, Dereck, and I) would hide a biscuit on somebody elses person. We’re a bit silly and it’s great to know that no matter how old we get, we will always be silly.

Gotta get ready… we’re going out for sushi and karaoke!

i woke up, headed out my door,  dialed up story trek to learn something new as i passed by the Cap Hill mansion. i turn left down 14th to see a futuristic 1 eyed warrior, down through the State Capital, past the marquee that says thousands of spiders aboard a cargo ship can’t dock, down the 16th street mall i go. i sit down to capture the adventure and my thoughts are interrupted by a German teen who wanted to know where i got my bracelet / rubber band animal. i give him my seahorse and give him the address where he  can purchase more.  i meet up with scott for a cup of coffee and head to test out a website’s userbility that encompasses history in denver. they pay me $50.00 for my time and i immediately turn around and purchase a beautiful red bag from a man from Senegal that’s perfect for being a productive city girl.

i come back to fashion denver, and immediately turn around to listen to a lecture about the servants from the Byers- Evans mansion.  more history.  i come back and work work work.

today has been a day of  fantastic.   now it’s off to band practice and preparing for my b.sous show on Thursday. Band notes are organized, set list

These rubber band animals have quite the buzz about them!  He stopped me on the street to find out where I got mine.

this is what my song “high” should look like. Can’t wait to get tracks onto computer and work on new tracks!!

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Staring up at the sky from the gardens of the Grant-Humphreys mansion, taking in life. Sun sets, dragon flies fly over head, and the sound of some mysterious insect or small animal squelches in the trees.

I take a moment to breathe and process the thoughts in my head, heart, and soul. Feeling a little blue but mostly a rainbow of colors, mixing together. I’ve spotted the sound of the squelching, a small and dainty bird with sharp beak.

The sun’s light through the trees illuminates and I wish I was up on a branch, watching the sunset.

In the distance I hear the voices from the bar and restaurant below.

Its so peaceful right now. I appreciate the space I am in and at this very moment. And to think that tomorrow, this house will be filled with fashion and people. I wonder what happened this very day at this very time 100 years ago?

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Last night I dreamt that I was at a pool party trying to find the perfect place to back flip. I wanted to get the perfect height and perfect bounce but the diving board didn’t allow me to get enough spring. I walked around to the side and realized I didn’t need a diving board to backflip, I could do it off the side of the wall.

I found myself on a train, traveling to the ocean and up over the ocean seeing the glowing seaweed below. I couldn’t tell how high up I was. If small sea animals were really small or if there was such great height that they were actually huge.

I dreamt my friend was sitting on the train with me and together we were rocking the seats on the train, feeling free in the open air.

I should try and paint this dream.
Recurring themes for me in this dream are: diving boards, pools, and back flips (always attempting to land the pefect backflip) and the ocean.

I don’t ever recall seeing the ocean so far below me in a dream before nor being confused about how high up I was.

I’ve never dreamt of train travel either. This train was different.. There were 2 rows of seats that faced each other and there was no cabin, just the open air. It was more of a ride.

In my dream I felt content and ready to go where the wind took me. It was quite an adventure!

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life is yet again and always, a crazy concoction of colors. again i am reminded to always follow my heart, to never settle, and to be free to be me. also, remembering that LOVE means:

Let

Others

Visions

Exist

……including my own.

this week has truly felt like summer and reminded me of being a kid, growing up when summer time days were long.  summer dresses, the ice cream man, bocce ball at the park, music, hula hoops, cool air conditioning, the smell of sunblock, waterworld, swimming pools,bbq .. you’re never too old for summer

Hidden in the darkest corner, not wanting to step out into the light. Spotlight on soon to be past, sadness.

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